Under All That Crazy…

They say that “marriage isn’t easy” – but I would argue that “most relationships aren’t easy.” You typically don’t work hard at something that is easy. And a relationship of any kind requires you to work hard at making time and sticking to promises. You need to believe in that person, support them with all your heart. You need to have faith, trust, commitment and honest communication. Those are all hard things to master. Relationships aren’t easy.

My other better half.

If I told you I was crazy, most of you would laugh. You would picture the loud girl at the party – sharing stories, doing just about anything to make people laugh and dancing like a fool-even if Justin and I are the only ones on the dance floor. Man he makes life fun….

Best dance of our lives.

But like most people, I have a different side of crazy. I can be an emotional timebomb, waiting to blast off at any moment. When I took Stackers in high school (those dang diet pills ruled my life), everyone at work would joke how moody they made me. But in reality, I was the moody one. It was (and still is) VERY easy for me to hold onto things and over analyze every single word or movement anyone made.
Why did she look away when she said that?

What did Justin mean when he said that? He probably was implying this or that.

Crazy. I can be undoubtedly crazy.

Justin being a smartass. Me, probably, being crazy.

It’s pretty obvious who sees the craziest side of me. My (wonderful) husband. But even though I can be crazy and get mad over the littlest things he says (even when he is being a smartass), I at least have the ability to come to my senses and say sorry. I have no problem admitting when I am wrong. Unless I am certain I am right (obviously).

And this morning, I wrote an email with the subject line “I’m sorry :(” – some things I just don’t blog about out of my privacy for myself and Justin – so I won’t go into details. But I will say the past few months some “external factors” have been hard on me. Some days underneath my outer layer of confidence, there hides a little girl full of insecurities. On those days, Justin sees the moody, on-edge side of Ashley. Yes, as much as I want everyone to think I am happy and positive and loving every single day of my life, I have my vulnerable moments too.

So as I wrote my email with teary eyes, I reminded him that I know I’m a work in progress. He later replied and said, “Who isn’t?” That made me smile.

I ended the email by saying,” I’m not easy to love. I understand that, but I’m so thankful I have you by my side. I know that there isn’t a single person in this world who could or ever will love me as much and truthfully as you do. I’m crying at work Justin thinking of life without you…and happy tears that I don’t have to worry about that right now because you are right by my side. =)”

What he wrote back made me cry, “You are SO easy to love. Because under all that crazy, there is the most compassionate, loving, self-less person I know. It just takes someone as mature as me to understand you. Lol”

And then he included these quotes at the very end. I believe these quotes are the perfect way to end this blog post and leave you with something to think about….

So wait, does this mean it’s official? Jokes.
We were looking Grandma Kaye in this picture. She went to the reception a little early.
Well someone had to get the party started, no one better than Gma Kaye.

“The success of marriage comes not in finding the “right” person, but in the ability of both partners to adjust to the real person they inevitably realize they married.” -John Fischer

“The ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but to hold hands.” -Alexandra Penney

“For a marriage to have any chance, every day at least six things should go unsaid.”- Unknown

“Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate.” -Barnett Brickner

“Marriage, ultimately, is the practice of becoming passionate friends.” -Harville Hendrix

Much love,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s