A Letter to My Son: Month 6

Dear Cooper,

Happy half birthday, little nugget!

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Eating your card – because everything goes into your mouth these days.

I can’t believe how quickly time is passing by.

Everyone warned me this would happen, but I couldn’t ever anticipate the truthfulness of their words. Sometimes, I look back at pictures from your newborn days and can’t even picture you being that small.

I somehow forget how stressed and crazy I felt during these first few weeks.

3 days old

4 days old

Up every 2 hours for feedings.

Trips to the doctor and hospital for feeding issues.

And moments of pure panic as I questioned if I was doing the right things.

I remember being afraid of putting you in your car seat. You seemed so fragile.

A few days old.

Off to the doctor.

I remember the only way I could get you to sleep would be snuggling with you on my chest. We’ve spend many nights sleeping in the nursery together.

Coop Day naps.

Coop Day naps.

I remember watching videos of how to wash a baby because I honestly had no clue how to bathe you.

Baby shark.

Baby shark.

I remember thinking that I’d never sleep in my own bed again. We lived downstairs on the couch for days – you slept in the bassinet of your pack-n-play and we slept on the couches. Bandit was always by our side too.

Bandit was completely exhausted those first few days too. PS look, you're smiling!

Bandit was completely exhausted those first few days too. PS look, you’re smiling!

I remember looking at the clock at 3 am and reading the quote in your bedroom. I would read it over and over – each time having a new memory and glimpse into the future pop into my mind. Tears of joy would stream down my face and onto yours as I kissed you and thanked God for bringing you into my life.

Beautiful girl from great grandma and grandpa Sieb.

Beautiful gift  from great grandma and grandpa Sieb.

I am no expert. I still question myself and wonder if I am doing the right things, but I will say it’s amazing how far we have come in these (quick) six months.

And I can’t go without saying that I’ve been amazed at how much your daddy has grown over the past 6 months too. I try my best to soak in all of the adorable moments you share with your daddy. I can always write about my stories and memories with you, but I truly hope you understand how much your daddy loves you.

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Twinsies.

One morning recently, you and daddy were laughing and looking in the mirror. You started smiling, laughing, and jumping. Your daddy kissed you on the forehead and said, “I hope you stay this happy forever.”

Look at how little you were!!!

Look at how little you were!!!

I share that same wish, baby boy.

I want you to be happy and love life as much as you do now.

Telling us all about our dreams.

Telling us all about our dreams.

A lot of people tell me that you are the happiest baby they have ever met. And I have to agree. I can already tell that you will be so kindhearted and full of life. You have so much to offer this world already and I hope you always keep your curiosity and excitement for life.

That beautiful smile...

That beautiful smile…

Anyway, back to your daddy!! You get so excited when daddy walks into the house from work. You get a big smile and start bouncing in my arms, “I missed you today, bubba!” Daddy will say.

He lifts you from my arms, gives you a kiss, and looks at me and says, “I just love him so much!”

I agree – wholeheartedly – and then daddy will ask about your day at daycare.

There are other moments that I will always cherish as well. Like when daddy wakes up early to feed you and then you fall asleep together on the chair. Or when I watch you playing together. Or when he dances around the house and you laugh at him.

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Doing the medicine man dance – a proven theory to help you take your meds.

I love how your daddy  is so hands on with you and would do anything in this world to provide for us and make sure we are happy.

Now this doesn’t mean we don’t fight- although we try hard not to do this around you. We certainly have our differences. We have our late night arguments (but we have a rule in place that nothing between the hours of 11 pm to 5 am can be held against us). In fact, the other day I brought up something your daddy said and he quickly reminded me, “Yeah well that was at 11:30 p.m. so you can’t hold that against me!”

Being a parent isn’t easy. Your daddy and I are challenged daily. But we are doing the best we can!

On Friday, we are heading back to Riley Children’s Hospital to have your head evaluated again. You’ve had  SUCH great progress. The flatness is looking a ton better and you’re getting stronger by the day. I’m so proud of you.

Speaking of days, we’ve had a lot of fun days, firsts, and memories  over the past month:

Your first walk of 2014.

Your first walk of 2014.

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Your first time eating in your big boy chair.

Your first major fart in front of mom. Yes, you lifted your leg and everything.

Your first major fart in front of mom. Yes, you lifted your leg and everything.

Your first ear infection (still smiling).

Your first ear infection (still smiling).

But you didn't smile in the exam room. You knew what was coming...

But you didn’t smile in the exam room. You knew what was coming…

Your first nap in mommy and daddy's bed.

Your first nap in mommy and daddy’s bed.

Your first time sitting up on your own!

Your first time sitting up on your own!

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You also love putting stuff in your mouth.

Who wants a hug!?

Who wants a hug!?

You have a theme song and I sing it daily, "Coop Doggy Dogggg."

You have a theme song and I sing it daily, “Coop Doggy Dogggg.”

Determined to get puppy brother's bone.

Determined to get puppy brother’s bone.

You are starting to roll over on your belly and sleep. I would nervous at first, but your sleeping better than ever now!

You are starting to roll over on your belly and sleep. I would be nervous at first, but your sleeping better than ever now!

You continue to take great selfies with me.

You continue to take great selfies with me.

Family walks are the best.

Family walks are the best.

You love petting puppy brother.

You love petting puppy brother.

Naps.

Naps are the best.

Matching mustaches.

Matching mustaches.

I went on a summer shopping spree.

I went on a summer clothes shopping for you!

Best picture of you...EVER!

Best picture of you…EVER!

Hanging out with your friends during your 6-month photo session.

Hanging out with your friends during your 6-month photo session.

Your eyes. I just melt...

Your eyes. I just melt…

Big ol' smile.

Big ol’ smile.

We love you!

We love you!

Your faces crack me up!

Your faces crack me up!

You have grown – both physically and emotionally- so much over the past month. You are strong, smart, and happy – the perfect package.  I love watching you grow and change, but I am also learning to live in the moment. I’m trying not to rush you. I’m trying not to say things like, “I can’t wait until he can crawl” or “I can’t wait until he can talk.”

I know these milestones will be fun when you eventually reach them, but I am honestly loving these moments of your life when you are still considered a baby. One day, I’ll wake up and you’ll be 30 years old and maybe have children of your own. So right now, I find myself sitting at work saying things like, “I can’t wait to get home” or “I can’t wait to take my boys on a walk.”

Let’s not rush, baby boy.

Let’s just take each day as it comes.

Let’s laugh, sing, and dance daily.  Mostly laugh (because you have the best laugh in the world).

Let’s enjoy every single moment that we get to share together.

Let’s love hard and forgive easy.

Deal?

I love you to the moon and back.

Much love,

Mom

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